I turned 60 last week and I suppose getting here is better than not, but it still feels as if the clock is running out, much more so than turning 40 or 50 (duh) and much, much more so because it seems as if I just turned 50. Where did those ten years go? Divorced at 49 nine after 20 years and one day of marriage. Since then it’s been a revolving door of cyber dating where seemingly everyone lies about something on their profile (I claim to be 5′ 10″ although I’m really 5’9 & 1/2 ” so it’s a relatively small lie, right?) Tall women lie about their height, claiming to be shorter, short women lie about being taller. Heavy women claim to be a “few extra pounds” and none of them understand the meaning of the word “few” (consisting of or amounting to a small amount) there-fore 20, 30, 40 or 50 pounds is definitely not a “few”. Then there are the married women looking for a guy on the side, who (of course) don’t mention this in their profile, unless it’s one of those sites that’s all about cheating on one’s spouse. While that is not my style, I have “dated” a married woman , who forgot to mention the married part until after the third or fourth “date”. These “dates” consisted of meeting, eating and finding a hotel room for after dinner entertainment, followed by her leaving before 3 am to go home to “let the dog out” or “feed the cat”, but in reality, it was to get home before her husband, who worked nights. I suppose I should’ve figured it out but ignorance is truly bliss and even when she uttered the words “I’ve got a secret” I didn’t wish to admit the obvious. The “relationship” lasted a couple of years, finally ending when she (and her husband) moved a little further away than she cared to drive for our “dates” at my place. I assumed she’d found someone closer to her new home and moved on, as did I.

That was several years ago and I’ve had many first dates (stopped counting at 50) since, a few (consisting or amounting to a small amount) seconds and even a couple (two) longer term relationships that eventually petered out for no particular reason. Now, at 60 I am blissfully unencumbered by romantic involvement, although I’ve been contemplating re-entering the world of cyber-dating, just to see if there are any new faces, perhaps a wealthy woman who like to date a middle-aged guy of, shall we say….55?

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